feeling bad about calling

Notes

Track 3

Pop music! Wanted to get back to my Fall Out Boy roots with this one hahahha. Jason and I started this track in the Bay and I finished it with Jed at Harcourt. It's a push and pull between feeling bad and desperate and angry and regret. It's a lot, it's the closest I've come to stream of conscious.

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charissa last winter i left you out on that pasture

i know that you kept me warm but both of us were deserving of more

i looked past all of my bad traits

and it came around when i couldn’t keep back the bad days

i know i was being awful

should’ve paid attention to signals that you were sending

should’ve told you when i felt like i was second guessing

i was quiet and distant it’s all clearer now that i miss it

and i’ll be honest every now and then i want you back

regardless of the fact i broke it off

we made a pact to stay connected then

you took off that necklace

i couldn’t blame you for hating the way i left it

but still wanna see you around

you needed space and it’s selfish but i still wanna see you around

i can’t shake a part of this

did you get caught up the way i do

two months and i’m still on it

am i to blame for things i knew

now i’m feeling bad about calling you

but i still wanna see you around

and i cared about you truly i promise

wasn’t there for you whenever you wanted

but i tried my best

(that’s all that i could do for you)

what more could you want than me to try my best

charissa i know that you’re hurt about my reaction

told you to change when really

i was afraid to show

thoughts about what i wanted

hiding all of the heavy and

kissing you on the carpet

kissing you on the carpet

somebody to hold

was i just a placement for

feelings that you couldn’t face

on your own

(on my own)

can’t shake a part of this

did you get caught up the way i do

[?] and i’m still on it

am i to blame for things i knew

now i’m feeling bad about calling

i can’t shake a part of this

did you get caught up the way i do

2 years and i’m still on it

am i to blame for things you knew

now i’m feeling bad about

im still feeling bad about calling you